my blog is revived finally. last post was around march 2008 and it's 29th of may today . ! time flies in a blink of eyes.no joke.. i haven't even started seeing derick at that time. and i already faced another breakup after him.

hah.

there have been al lot of gossipings going on. somehow i think i know , for no reason. cousins been talking about me, friends . etc . i don't know what's with the attention paid on me but being busybody is THE human trait anyway.

so i'm the one who dumps someone to be with another better guy .. and i deserve all that i 'm going through .? say whatever you want.. i don't even care.. i know who i am and i'm never a person who cares about what others think of me. if they would think i'm like that, they don't even know me.

hence i don't need friends like them. that's because they judge.they judge everything. i'm very disappointed actually..because for what i had gone through, i don't think i deserve to be treated this way.. at least not the close ones. i lost hope . there's nothing to cherish ,fine.

i settled down for kent. i quit my bad habits, i stayed at home almost everyday just to stay in touch with him via skype, even if i'm out, i dared not even stay longer because i knew he'll be waiting for me. i thought of him whenever i go, whatever i was doing, without fail. i just want to be a good person and i know he'll be thrilled to have me who's even better than the one he met initially.

he really did persuade me that he was gonna be with me forever. he made me believe that he was so deeply in love with me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. a lot of promises he made. empty promises.

i only knew when things were over. when sean talked to me. he has never thought of the consequences of things he said. period.

sometimes i think i should be blamed for being too careless in r'ships. or naive, stupid whatever u say. 

i always knews that girls should be independent and be able to support themselves, financially, physically and mentally. WITHOUT relying on men. i've been telling myself too. but then when he showed up. i became soft. i thought there was someone who could support me, mentally. i'm a girl, after all. i'm not as strong as ppl thought. i'm weak at certain times. i can't help it.. and kent, he was there.. we shared everything. we were so close.

we knew that we've found each other. we were too compatible.

and there 9 days before our reunion. we broke up. and it upsets me even more when i know that peope are not concerned about me.but everything besides me.i'm not an attention seeker. but my heart was broken. crushed. i've done my very best to make this r'ship works. it's just 9 more days . i swore i'll give him the best of me. nothing was appreciated. devastated and lost.

i'll only blame myself and not move on when i omitted in a failed r'ship.

i didn't.

i became a better person. i wanted him to have a good gf.

so. no regrets.

i trusted him . because i gave him all my love.  again i was wrong. i should never give all my trust to a man. but then again. it was all out of love

i told everyone that when one's heart is not in it , there's no point to hagn on to the r'ship. so, move on without feeling sad.

i cried uncontrollably, i was depressed. but surprisingly i got over 2 days after the breakup.  fastest recovery ever ! unbelievable. especially the one whom i really thought of settling down with.

any how i moved on. i've been hitting the gym and living a healthy lifestlyle. i feel fresh everyday,

it feels so good.

at the end of the day, i know that i've become a better person after every breakup.

i've never felt better.

Is Coffee Healthy or Bad?

Considering all the past concern about possible health risks from drinking coffee, newer reports of coffee’s possible protective effects may leave many people confused.

Overall, recent studies suggest that coffee (regular and decaffeinated) may offer a variety of health benefits against diseases such as cancer and diabetes. However, coffee may not deserve a place in the same category with other healthful foods like vegetables, fruits and whole grains.

Laboratory studies suggest that the anti-inflammatory, antioxidant compounds in coffee could help reduce risk of cancer. Coffee also has a tendency to speed the passage of waste through the digestive tract. Potentially, this may lessen the time that cancer-causing compounds spend in contact with the intestinal tract, which could reduce the risk of colon cancer. Population studies, however, tend to split between coffee intake having no effect on or reducing risk of breast and colon cancer.

Diabetes Prevention

The case for coffee’s ability to protect against diabetes is strengthened by several recent studies. In the Iowa Women’s Health Study, more than 28,000 women were followed for 11 years. The women who drank four or more cups of coffee daily were about 20 percent less likely to develop diabetes. That became a 30 to 40 percent drop among those who drank decaf coffee.

A study in Finland linked consumption of three to six cups of coffee per day with a 25 percent lower risk of diabetes. In both studies, benefits were seen after adjusting for other diabetes risks, such as weight, diet, and activity level. Several studies now link moderate coffee consumption with lower risk of Type 2 diabetes. Researchers are working to understand the potential advantage of decaf versus regular coffee and how weight control is involved.

Potential increased risk of high blood pressure and heart disease has been one of the long-standing concerns about coffee. Recent studies confirm that caffeine can raise blood pressure, but this effect is observed with soft drinks, not coffee. Laboratory studies suggest that perhaps coffee’s healthful compounds can counterbalance the blood-pressure raising effects of caffeine.

In the Iowa Women’s Health Study noted above, four to five cups of coffee a day were linked with a 19 percent lower risk of heart-related death. Other studies have found no effect of coffee consumption on heart disease risk. But people should follow their doctor’s advice.

Coffee does warrant some cautions, however. Both regular and decaf coffee relax the muscle that keeps stomach acids from rising into the throat, so those with heartburn or reflux disease (GERD) are encouraged to avoid or strictly limit coffee. People with trouble sleeping should limit or avoid caffeinated coffee.

Studies now suggest it is unnecessary for pregnant women to completely avoid caffeinated coffee. Until the impact of caffeine is more clearly understood, however, many experts suggest that pregnant women limit their daily caffeine from coffee, soft drinks and other sources to about 300 mg, the equivalent of three cups of regular coffee.

It’s exciting that something as simple as drinking coffee might help lower our risk of cancer, diabetes and heart disease. However, while brewed coffee (not instant) is a concentrated source of antioxidants, it can’t be a substitute for berries, legumes, nuts, and other fruits and vegetables that provide antioxidants along with a wide range of vitamins, protective compounds and dietary fiber.